While I am Catholic, I do not know much about the religion. As a child we did not attend church as my father had been married before and had never had his first marriage annuled. I did go from time to time with my friend Billie, but never on a consistent basis or with my family.
I bring this up now, for two reasons. One, my friend Erin, who I have mentioned before, has asked me to be her son’s God Mother and two, this is something that I personally have been thinking about since I became a parent.
It is especially important to me because of SM being the age he is. He is constantly questioning things such as where people go when they die and at Christmas it was asking about the manger and the story of Christ. I really want to be able to provide him with the correct answers. I want to give them the foundation. I need to get them involved and going to church and it’s something that WILL happen in 2008.
On the friend front, being asked to be Ben’s God Mother is a big deal to me and I really want to be there for my friend Erin. I need to learn and know the things that are important for being a good God Parent. I need to do more than a “Google Search.”
Any of you going through this? Working to figure things out spiritually? Anybody out there have any suggestions or insights.
Congratulations! What an honor!! I think Sunday mass would be the best start for a good foundation. I wish you the best….godmommy
That is great you were asked. A god parent is not perfect and what a great example you would be by starting to study the faith more.
I’m going through similar issues. Although, I haven’t been asked to be a God parent, I’m Catholic, and I’m trying to figure things out spiritually. My husband is not religious at all, which makes it difficult. I can only get him to go to church on Christmas. The rest of the time, I either go by myself, or drag my son with me, or just not go at all. I tried to get my kids to pray before bedtime or before dinner and they’re just not interested. Part of me feels like straying from the Catholic church and finding a church where my whole family can get into. But the other part of me doesn’t want to leave the religion and the beliefs I grew up with.
I know our priest would welcome anybody who showed interest and would be the best teacher of all. Good luck! You should be really proud of yourself!
Oh…sorry sweetie…you’re asking the wrong girl about this.
If I walk into a church I may burst into flames.
(Ok, so not really, I’m being dramatic. But I’m not very religious)
Oh, That’s awesome!
Not sure about the parish nearest you, but ours offers some great RCIA (Rite of Christan Initiation) class. These classes, offered to anyone looking to learn more/become part of the Church, should be free of charge and open to anyone. The coordinator at our church is always encouraging people to drop by anytime, be part of the discussion, ask questions, etc.
Even after growing up as a cradle Catholic, going to Catholic school, then a Catholic college, I’ve been be interested in learning more about my faith. (There’s always more to learn)
As an adult, and especially as a parent, I’m only now really getting all the richness that our faith has to offer. There are so many great places to start…
That is soo cool. Congrats Shannan
I attend a nondenominational church.
I was saved in 2005.
Before that I was so against “religion”.
Then I found out the DIFFERENCE between Spirituality and Religion….WOW….BIG difference.
I am SPIRITUAL not religious. So is my Church. My Church is a little bit of everyone – from every religious background to every culture/race you can imagine….and it is AWESOME.
I attend Church every Sunday and Wednesdays and anytime they have special guest speakers (which we have a lot of them) I take my son too….I want him to grow up KNOWING God and JESUS…and knowing the DIFFERENCE between SPIRITUAL vs. RELIGIOUS.
I think it is VERY important for our children in this day and age to have this foundation – I wish I had had it.
The world is getting crazier….they (our babes) really need to KNOW the bible…KNOW God and except JESUS as their savior.
Religious beliefs are often based on cultural conditioning. Most religious beliefs are inherited from the family and or learned in institutional settings or through contact with the society at large (in a group). Spiritual beliefs on the other hand are most often based on personal experience�..not believing in a �structure� but just believing in God himself.
I don�t know if my rambling helped?
Thanks for coming to see me!
)
A-Licious
First, Congratulations!
Second, you are a brave woman for seeking opinions/advice on such a hot topic here!
Third, you are certainly not alone! I’ve been struggling with this very issue since the day my oldest was born 16 years ago and am Godmother to one nephew already. As I’ve grown older and have been blessed with other children, my beliefs have evolved (quite painfully at times…) and I have had to make the painful decision to decline the invitation to be a Godparent to another nephew, even though I have all the “proper papers.”
In my parish, you must prove not just your Catholic background, like baptism, confirmation, etc, but also your attendance and active involvement in the congregation. For your children to attend CCD, they must bring the weekly bulletins to prove that they went to mass… If you walk into the office and they don’t know your face, you can be sure to receive a cool reception!
At the time that my most recent nephew was being Baptised and I was so honored to be asked, I was able to obtain the required Certificate of Sponsorship. However, I had entered this phase of really questioning whether this religion was right for me and my own children–given the guilt that I was experiencing –torturing myself over even having these questioning thoughts, it indicated some serious messed up issues!
I could not, in good faith, accept that lovely honor of sponsorship, given that I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to remain a Catholic.
Anyway, my husband & I have had countless hours of discussion over this very issue. He thinks I “think” too much about it–that 99% of people who do attend Catholic church today just attend and take out what they need and leave the rest behind. If they don’t believe in parts of the doctrine, (or don’t bother to learn it) then that’s fine. It’s better to have some structured faith if it helps them to cope with their daily struggles. If it gives them some divine presence, that’s even better.
I struggle with the knowledge that I simply don’t believe in key parts of doctrine and yet am promising to live by that doctrine when I call myself Roman Catholic. I feel that am lying. I also feel that I don’t want my children saddled with the same guilt-ridden lessons that I learned as a child. (I volunteered for a year to assist in my son’s CCD class to assure myself that times had changed… and seeing that it’s pretty much the same as it was 30 years ago, I decided to take my children out of CCD.)
Do I feel like I live in the presence of God? Yes. Do I attend mass? No, not anymore. Christianity is firmly embedded in our household and my children have all been Baptised. Unfortunately, I haven’t found any other denomination nearby because my family is so dyed-in-the-wool Catholic that it’s “easier” for me to be a non-practicing Catholic than practicing “something else” (Remember wars have been fought over religion! I’m pretty sure that my extended family would not be above that mentality…) Do I miss involvement in a formal religious community? Absolutely!
My weigh in is right with the writer who recommended classes. Ours too has very good religious adult education classes–it’s a wonderful way of seeing if your parish is the right community for you.
I would recommend being proactive about it though. Don’t put it off. My only regret through my whole ordeal is that I did tread water for so long. I still don’t know which denomination I belong to, maybe none, but it’s a relief to have taken a step and still know that I’m a part of God’s community.
I know that not everyone will agree with me on this one, but I believe that God loves us all, regardless of whether we’re Catholic, Jewish, Agnostic, Buddhist, Wiccan… you name it. I think we all honor Him in the best way that we can, and He appreciates our efforts no matter how they’re fashioned.
I just want to thank everyone for their posts. It is such a huge decision – in many of our lives – and I appreciate you sharing your thoughts and experiences.
Shannan
Coming in late …
First, how wonderful to be asked.
As for religion, spirituality, etc…
My family’s background (and my experiences with churches) have left me leery. I grew up going to church three times a week. Sometimes more.
I don’t attend now. Maybe in the future. It’s not so much a question of my beliefs, but whether I’m ready to deal with churches.
I am a Catholic. We attend mass weekly. It was hard to start. But the kids have so many questions and religion answers them through stories. They are comforted with these stories. very much so. It is nice to believe as a child and feel comforted. I can;t imagine a better way to raise a child. In comfort. In belief. Does that make sense?
I think that it is normal that you seek spirituality after having children.
I grew up Southern Baptist and Jason grew up Catholic. We both abandoned “religion” as young adults and after having children have revisited “religion”. We found somewhere that we are both comfortable and are able to grow spiritually. I think that is a life long journey.
As for “godparenting”… Jason is the godparent for 2 neices.. ummm yeah the only duty it seems to really have given us.. is 2 extra birthday gifts and Christmas gifts to buy. I don’t think the Godparent thing is really taken spiritually seriously.
If that makes sense… : )
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