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It’s True, The Little Things Really Are Important

The other night I was talking with my mother, seeking her advice on a parenting issue. You see recently the B-man, who will be 3 in June, has been acting out. I had originally attributed it to “the terrible two’s” but more recently began to think it might be something else.

In talking with her she suggested that perhaps the B-man was envious of SM. Of course I had no idea what she was talking about. I mean I treat both boys the same. I don’t play favorites at all and I try to be fair and reasonable when it comes to discipline so why would he be jealous.

And then it hit me. What my mom was talking about was the B-Man being envious of the “big boy” things that SM gets to do. Because SM is 5 he gets to ride the bus, he goes to school and he gets to play soccer. All things that the B-Man desperately wants to do.

Since that conversation I have made an extra effort to do special things with the B-man and it seems to be working. He’s gotten to go with me to the grocery, we’ve played games and read books – just the two of us. In doing all these things the hitting has started to subside and the sassy attitude, while still there, its at least easing up.

I hate to think that he was feeling short-sheeted in the grand scheme of things and am glad that my efforts appear to be working. It really is the little things that are important, especially when you are little.

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7 Responses to “It’s True, The Little Things Really Are Important”

  1. That’s so good to hear! Doesn’t it feel awesome when you have those “light bulb moments”? :-)

  2. Thanks for the warning of what’s ahead. Right now we’re dealing with my 3 year old being jealous of her little 8 month old sister. Every night I hear “Don’t nurse Baby A. It takes too long!”

    I used to let her keep me and baby company, but no milk goes in if big sister is there–too darn distracting!

  3. You know, I was just thinking the same thing with my boys.

    We’ve had spring break so Josh and I have been playing on his DS together. Sam’s been getting jealous and wants Mommy time too — which he normally gets when Josh is at school.

    I had to remind myself of this the other day and make sure to spend time with just him — playing with the blocks, on the computer, just doing mommy-sammy things.

  4. My 3-year-old desperately wants to do everything his 5-year-old sister does. I’m expecting this to become more pronounced next year, when she starts kindergarten.

  5. Yes… you are so right.

    My 3rd child gets so short sleeved. I have to spend some mroe time with her. GREAT post!

  6. It is so hard to balance individual time and make sure each kid gets to feel special. I think my middle child gets the shaft all the time.

    Remember sibling rivalry prepares children for conflict in other relationships later on in life. You’re making your boys excellent husbands!

  7. I had a similiar light bulb experience a couple of months ago with my oldest, who is 3 1/2. I started to do similiar things as you stated and it really did help curb the temper tantrums. It really is the small things. :)

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