Last week I wrote about how the people organizing the For the Love of Kids Parenting Conference at the Duke Energy Center this weekend had contacted me and offered to let Mommy Bits readers submit questions to their experts.  I loved the idea, shared the opportunity with you and boy did you have questions! Rather than just send everyone their respective answers, I thought I’d post a few of them here – for everyone.  It’s quite a list of questions/answers (six pages) – everything from potty training to helping your little one adjust after a big move – so I can’t post them all here, but if you’d like to see the complete list, just should me an email and I’ll send them to you.

Here we go:

Reader Submitted Question:  Here is mine: My 7-year-old daughter had participated in dance class for three years, but she started to lose interest, or rather had a hard time staying focused and “just wanted to do twirls”. After a big move it was easy to just let her relax and settle in the new environment for awhile. She still does not want to be involved in anything, though. Cheerleading, dance, tennis, soccer, playing an instrument. I am a stay-at-home mom and I think she is just “too comfortable” being home with the family. We’ve been in our new state now for over a year and I think she should be settled in enough, how do I encourage her desire to have other skills/activities? Should I just wait until she’s older to push a little? Thanks so much!!

Answer from Parent Coach Jamie Mazza of MyParenting Source.com®: I understand your dilemma! Parents often walk a fine line in knowing when to push and when to stay back. You made a wise decision allowing your daughter to become comfortable in her new surroundings. Moving can be very hard.

I do think, however, that now is the time to encourage her to choose an activity. Brainstorm together possibilities or find something that she can do with a friend. Pick something that is not a long commitment and ask her to try it for a session (a six- to eight-week session of art classes for example).

Reader Submitted Question: My daughter still has a couple years before she’ll enter school. She is 2 years old and attends preschool/daycare now. With all the different teaching methods and philosophies available (but not easily understood) to parents, how do you know which is best for your child? Does every child benefit from, say, a Montessori school? Is traditional the best way to go for the majority of families?

Answer from Parent Coach Nancy Prisby of MyParenting Source.com®: A blanket statement stating that one school is better than the other cannot be made because there are too many variables. Children have different temperaments, and families have different preferences. Children can thrive in both settings.

You are in a great situation now because you have time to research the different teaching methods.  Perhaps the best way to learn about each method is to visit schools with different teaching methods. Ask if you can observe a class in session. Request a tour of the facility. Obtain literature on the schools you are considering.

Knowing your child and your family, it may be clear after your visits and observations what you feel is best for your daughter.

Reader Submitted Question:  My 2-year-old daughter has blossomed into what’s referred to as a “spirited” child. She is very independent and doesn’t particularly like the structure of things like storytime or classes or shows. She fusses and acts up quite frequently when she can’t do whatever she feels like at that second, while it seems like the other kids her age just hang out and do what they’re “supposed” to. She also likes to be the center of attention.

Do I need to be stricter with her? Looser? Meaner? Nicer? Should I worry that she marches to the beat of her own drum, even when it’s disruptive to others?

Answer from Parent Coach Nancy Prisby of MyParenting Source.com®: At age 2, your daughter is at a developmental stage in which she is trying to exert her independence. She really is quite young to be expected to sit still if she has a more active temperament. Therefore, given her temperament, you may want to adjust your expectations, and limit sit-down activities for the time being. Perhaps gradually add them into your routine as your daughter grows. If you force her to sit, you will more than likely have a power struggle on your hands.

That being said, as she grows, you can introduce her to rules, routine, and structure. The more consistent you stay, the easier it will be. Model the behavior you desire. Pick your battles, and focus on your daughter’s strengths. Allow plenty of activity for your daughter during non-structured times, and accept her temperament.

The more you allow her to march to the beat of her own drum when the timing allows, the more likely she will be to connect, respect and comply when more structure comes her way.

A big thank you Beech Acres Parenting Center and to the experts with MyParenting Source.com.  If you are in the Cincinnati area check out the For the Love of Kids parenting conference this Saturday!